Sydney Avey

Dynamic Woman — Changing Times

What About Love?

Feb 5, 2013 | Faith, Uncategorized, Writing life | 1 comment

romantic moment

Kwest19|dreamstime.com

With apologies to the many wonderful writers in Romance Writers of America, I don’t like romance. To my mind, it has an “ick” factor. No book jacket with the romance label entices me.

I’m hoping I’m wrong, because I like romantic moments—sharing our dreams during intimate dinners in fine restaurants, resting my head against his shoulder as we watch the sun set from the deck of The Royal Clipper as it sails out of Iles des Saintes—that sort of thing. But what I recall from my sketchy reading of romance novels is heroines who want a man, whether they know it or not. The fun is in the machinations they will go to get the man, and ultimately the life, they want.

This week I decided to read love stories. At the same time, I happened onto Bernard of Clairvaux’s four degrees of love. It was enlightening, especially when I applied the concepts to writing fiction. If you believe that God is love, there is no reason why He can’t be factored into the equation.

Like burns, first degree is affecting but the least penetrating. The bar moves up from there.

First degree love is self-preservation. In its lowest form, it’s the “Sex in the City” kind of love. It’s entertaining.

In the second degree, we expand our love to include God and that empowers us to love others as we love ourselves. The “Gift of the Magi” comes to mind, where a husband and wife each sell their most precious gift to have something to give to each other. It’s emotionally engaging.

Third degree love causes us to lift our eyes past ourselves and others to appreciate God for who He is rather than what he does for us. Joan of Arc, perhaps? It’s inspirational.

Fourth degree love is largely unattainable in this life, but for moments. Think “Tree of Life”, where you lose yourself in beauty. It’s transformative.

Many first degree love stories are being written. I daresay there are fourth degree love stories being attempted. My sis suggests that John Valjean in Les Miserables moves through all four stages of love.

The sweet spot seems to be in the second and third degrees. Who is writing emotionally engaging (not gagging) and inspirational (not hack) love stories today?

We’re discussing this on LinkedIn’s Fiction Writer’s Guild forum. Join the discussion.

1 Comment

  1. Wendy Waters

    Superb and insightful. Love as burn and in degrees. First degree leaves scars on the skin. Second degree leaves scars on the psyche. Third degree leaves scars on the soul and fourth degree (and beyond?) burns through humanity and transforms. Fascinating spin on romance, Sydney. Love is so much more than mere sex. And God is intrinsically the principle of love, present on every level or degree!

    Reply

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Crafting a Novel Around a Real Person: An Interview with Sydney Avey – WRITE NOW!

Crafting a Novel Around a Real Person: An Interview with Sydney Avey – WRITE NOW!

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